I was more thinking


Beryl in a Hype attitude *Were going camping! It will be fun!!* YAY!

*loroi tactical facepalm*

"SPACE CAMPING!"

Can´t help me, but Alex has this kind of "oh god no..." expression on his face.
I wonder what Beryl tells him.
But I have to agree with sunphoenix, they really look cute together!

"The captain said that if I'm on my best behavior, I can use tweezers to pull out some of your nose hairs for further study! "

Aah, but you forgot that Loroi personal space is so large, where her toughts are interfering each others, so that means humans have no need for personal space at all!

I'm betting it's something like: "Then we'll finally have time together to teach me English!"

Oh, man, that face really sells the whole thing. Although he looks more surprised than terrified in my opinion. There's an attractive humanoid female in his face and he looks mildly surprised. Words cannot describe.

On a completely unrelated note, bearded elf-girl pics are still bouncing around /tg/. I escape them for a moment, and *bam* another one pops up.

As I'm sure /tg/ would tell you, there is no escape.

I´d rather teach her french...
*cough*

I foresee the use of the phrase "Ménage à trois" in the near future. As a description. If you know what I mean.

I'm not sure if I feel proud or ashamed.

Re: new update

"But...don't you like me?"



Go with both.

Heh. Be proud. That's what I did after I wrote my Romney/Santorum fanfic.

Whoops said too much.

Uhmmm... eww!

Was that a generic fanfic, or a slashfic? I'm not sure which is worse

Come on, dude. There are some things it is better to not inquire about.

It actually wasn't that bad. It ends with *SPOILERS* Newt Gingrich turning into the avatar of Cthulhu, Ron Paul saving the day with his zeppelin, and both Romney and Santorum dropping out of the race. It is also hinted that they engage in consensual but very unChristian activities.

I was going to add an epilogue and post it to deviantArt or something, but I don't have the money for the potential legal fees involved, so...(I mean, American laws on free speech and parody are pretty lax, but I'm pretty sure that Romney, Santorum, and Gingrich could make my life hell if they wanted to. So I won't.)

...

Back on topic starting now.



My heart stopped.

Mine too. Where's her beard? Thats not right.

Looking at those photos, the latter hints she is sharing bad news (possibly related to the previous discussion related to fireblade?), which I would assume she lightens with the brighter first picture of 'well she's forbidden from squashing you into a pancake, unless you show some sign of overt aggression towards one of us, so you are COMPLETELY safe as long as you do what we ask.'

or perhaps she is making more biological enquiries?

...man, I am out of practice.

DAMMIT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO



"...n-no, Beryl, that's actually completely normal. Human males do that all the time. It's biological or something."

'Captain, It has come to my attention that you awaken in a certain... condition each day, and our medical technicians have been concerned that you have failed to attend to it in a manner expected of males of our own race, they are requesting that accommodations be made due to a certain... biological accumulation they have been noting on the scans.
It has even been suggested that some of the relics we have obtained from your ship might hold the key to assisting you. Could you... Um... explain their purpose if not for visual entertainment?'

(yeah, beryl worked out how to use Um properly XD)
Jardins reaction?:
Oh crap they found Pauls stash didn't they? Why did they look behind that bookcase!!

*a few hours later*

'Ahh right, well actually Beryl those are... Um... whats the word in trade again? Food preparation books.... Cookery books, and if you look here you will see a slice of what we call 'cake', this is similar to that 'bread' you gave me, but as a sweet dish like that green prickly fruit you gave me, kinda.'

This is a command to expand that post and publish the finish results in the fanfic thread. Because that is just awesome.

Really, Loroi and food...since they don't really do much with fine dining and their views on food consumption are vastly different from human views, I can see how cookbooks could be initially perceived as some sort of perverted alien entertainment. What on earth would they make of us? We make elaborate rituals around the preparing, serving, and eating of food. We pay to subtle nuances in food's taste. We view dinnertime as a social event.


inb4AlexstartsflirtingwithBerylusingfood

i'm sorry but i'd have to deny that request as what i desire as a designed outcome is unlikely to work out, because I am not skilled enough with innuendo to do the 'cookery book' justice.

I keep having visions of the book in question having a scantily clad lady holding a delicious slice of chocolate cake... or perhaps this first book being about cookery yes, but then beryl dragging out another book involving a different lady and whipped cream, curiously enquiring what kind of 'cookery book' it was...
Of course this would need a comic drawn to do alex's face justice, just to capture that expression, and then as he tries to uncomfortably explain the book, beryl drags out an atlas of earth and asks what you cook with it as well.

In fact I can picture a number of such scenarios, and unfortunately for alex, they all go down the slippery slope into 'do not touch' areas that aren't appropreate on a public open forum.
Not that people don't knock on that door often enough around here, I just safely endeavour to steer my imaginings away from it... or at least TRY to.
Maybe someone else might have a go?

(Note: I'm also assuming that beryl says this all straight face, but the smirks on the face of the guards behind Alex show that actually they know what kind of torture they are putting him through, after all, they are more human than we'd ever expect.)

Oh, man, you need to write this. If you don't, this world will lose a prime potential humor source. I mean, wow. Maybe it's best if this remains in the realm of the hypothetical so people can imagine all the humorous bits, but...

You know, if this topic doesn't get anything written about it by the time I wake up tomorrow (which is going to be some time around 4 PM Coordinated Universal Time), I'm taking a shot at it. Because I can.

And I am very sorry for asking, but why on earth would Alex be "unfortunate" in these scenarios?

...mind you, I can imagine Loroi warriors shaking their heads in disbelief that any species could ever muster the power to cook an entire planet...