Fanfic: Interviews

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GBscientist
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Fanfic: Interviews

Post by GBscientist »

I wrote this fanfic a while back, but never got around to posting it on the DigitalWebbing forums. I hope you all enjoy it.

***

“Well, that was interesting,” Jim Peterson said as he walked down the hallway away from the meeting he had just finished. Peterson was a big man in both height and width, but he prided himself upon his minimal beer gut. Considering that his diet was the same as it had been during his childhood in Texas, it was an accomplishment.

“I did not expect him to be so. . . effeminate,” Park Rhee (‘Rob’ to his non-Korean friends) commented. Rob walked beside Jim and both tried very hard not to pay attention to the two green-clad alien soldiers walking ahead of them and the other two walking behind.

“Oh, just say it, Rob. That boy was gayer than a San Francisco drag queen review.” Jim replied.

“I would never say that. I just don’t have your gift for comparisons,” Rob replied. “Still, I shouldn’t have been surprised, given the differences in culture.”

“The whole set-up around here gives me the willies. Every one of those teal armoured ladies looks ready to rip my head off and spit down my neck,” Jim complained. “And having a biological requirement to make whoopee every day sounds like a mixed blessing if ever I heard one.”

“Agreed on both counts. The gender ratio certainly accounts for the women taking over the aggressive roles, but I can’t quite figure out why the males don’t assert more dominance, given that they are the scarce resource.”

“Yeah. The men seem to get passed around like some kind of currency. Maybe the telepathic connection from skin contact has something to do with why they don’t show some independence and go on a date with Palmela Handerson to take care of the daily duty.”

“Perhaps they can’t ‘salute’ without skin contact telepathic amplification? Like a conditioned response?”

“Or their nervous system is so tied up with their telepathy that they’re physically unable to without skin telepathy?”

“Equally plausible,” Rob agreed.

“Boys need some Viagra out here,” Jim suggested.

“I think our respective colleges back on Earth expect more findings than ‘send aphrodisiacs’.”

“If the best biologist and psychiatrist with security clearances can’t find more than that, Earth’s got bigger problems than a technology gap,” Jim quipped.

“Bigger sample size?” Rob asked.

“Bigger sample size,” Jim agreed.

***

“That was certainly different,” Jim said as they left the interview room. A day had passed since the first interview.

“Yes. Our second interviewee was the polar opposite of our first. Care to comment on the discrepancy?” Rob asked.

“Fluke? Normal variation? I really can’t say either way. We’re going to need at least one more interview.”

“Agreed. How would you characterise number two?”

“College frat boy. I knew more than my share back home, and they would brag about their conquests and feats of manhood just like he did. The fact that he had beers for each of us doesn’t hurt the comparison at all.”

“How did he get those this far from our territory?”

“Maybe the males around here have some clout after all, or maybe their whims are catered to as long as they don’t try to do anything important. At this point, all I’m certain of is that MJD never tasted so good.”

“Yes. After going without the whole trip here, any alcohol was welcome. The fact that he insisted that we be provided beverages of equivalent intoxicating effect to his own could indicate some interesting societal rules about hospitality and guests, not unlike the older cultures on Earth.”

“Yeah. Reminds me of a couple of Saudi guys I knew. Hold on a second,” Jim said to Rob. He turned to the guard behind and to his right. “Excuse me, could I get a sample of whatever the male I was just interviewing was drinking? I’d like to do some tests to find out its chemical composition.”

“That can be arranged,” the Soroin guard agreed coldly.

“Thank you.”

“Why not just ask for the data on the beverage’s composition? I’m sure they have it on file somewhere,” Rob asked.

“I’d rather do the tests myself; to be sure they weren’t screwing with me.”

“Ah. Shall we retire to our separate computers and write our reports?”

“Yup. I reckon we should.”

***

“Well that boy was about as normal as I could ever expect a hundred year old space elf to be,” Jim commented after leaving the third interview. It was day three and both men were tired of the bizarre culture and atmosphere of the Loroin colony world.

“Heartily agreed. Providing us an interview subject with actual authority in his family’s affairs and some say in civil matters has thrown all of my theories into the garbage,” Rob complained.

“So where does that leave us?”

“I believe that we will see no more pattern of behaviour here than we would find in males on Earth. Finding an underlying social template for Loroi males is going to take a lot longer than we originally anticipated.”

“So, we can either come to the conclusion that Loroi males have to be taken as individuals, or we can keep digging for the next decade?”

“I believe that is what it amounts to.”

“I already have my tenure. I’m gonna leave that kind of manure shovelling to a grad student. I wanna go home.”

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CrimsonFALKE
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by CrimsonFALKE »

very nice work

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sunphoenix
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by sunphoenix »

Nice work, indeed! lol!

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Hālian
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by Hālian »

Man what is it with you and fancy colored links? :P
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CrimsonFALKE
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by CrimsonFALKE »

Making a colored link isn't that hard, although I am wondering if make a short human sided fanfiction.

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Charlie
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by Charlie »

Humans are my favorite species of all time, of all time.
No sorcery lies beyond my grasp. - Rubick, the Grand Magus

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CrimsonFALKE
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by CrimsonFALKE »

Humans are awesome 8-)

chocolate7
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by chocolate7 »

Hmmmmm its very nice work,,./.
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Mr Bojangles
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Re: Fanfic: Interviews

Post by Mr Bojangles »

I quite enjoyed that, GB, thank you for sharing.

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