Writing Prompts

[Werra]

No joke, I wouldn't be surprised if some of the character designs make a cameo appearance in the comic.

[Brent7s]

Well Arioch is the writer and so he can do whatever he wants to do with his story...we just get to play with ideas in his universe. But remember Gamemasters rule the game and what they say happens is what happens....the good ones tend to adapt....and play along with your ideas.

[dragoongfa]

As amusing as it would be I doubt that Arioch hasn't nailed down the story enough to outdo whatever a few wackjobs on the internet can come up with, especially after more than a decade of mental planning

[Zarya]

Perhaps the impossible just takes slightly longer?

I’d get a writers block having to invent a plausible solution for dealing with a blitz carried out by 20 divisions.

[Razor One]

I am officially not dead. Decided to throw my hat towards contributing a bit towards New Frontiers, since Beacons appears to be getting plenty of writing love and I needed something to get back into the groove of writing again.

Spoilers ho.

SpoilerShow

I'd initially started writing to introduce a couple of new characters tending the forges just before the arianesin decided to show up, but had to scrap that plan when Zarya updated, so I changed them from tending the forges to being with the ore gathering party and adjusting as necessary.

Decided to ratchet up the stakes a bit. The way I picture them, arianesin are solitary hunters when times are plenty, and pack hunters in leaner times, with the pack allowing them to take down more dangerous prey such as wayward loroi dirals.

I figure there might be a bit of conflict on the leadership front between leaving their position for a better one or sticking it out where they are since they already have the best position. There's also a fire under their collective asses to fortify their position and produce weapons pronto for the more general group as well, to say nothing of what technically counts as an upcoming battle. If they can wipe out an arianesin pack, that's probably major bragging rights, and with all that skin and fur, they're all getting arianesin skin cloaks for extra badassery.

Not to say that running away isn't also a plausible solution. Just less exciting from a narrative standpoint.

On the character front, widening the scope a little to give a view from other characters was originally my aim, but I couldn't quite work it in organically with the angle of approach I had to take. Check the second spoiler below for details to my additions to the cast.

SpoilerShow

This is for those who might decide to use (or are just interested in) Blackrune (sillar lazal) and Copperspike (bein toniin) just in case I disappear again and don't get to characterise them as I'd originally planned.

Blackrune is one of the groups tinkerers. Good with her head and her hands, her nickname is earned because if her raven black hair, grey eyes, and her habit of marking anything she makes with patterns or lettering, always complaining that it never feels quite finished until she does that. Has a decent amount of general knowledge and is keenly interested in trying to reproduce Natan's firearm as a kind of hobby project if the materials can be spared. She's already been casting a weather eye at reproducing ammunition for his musket in the meantime. Tends to favour technical skills over fighting skills. Is friends with Copperspike with the attendant thick skin that requires.

Copperspike is one of the groups medics. While they are training to be Soroin, putting people on specialised duties makes sense since it frees up others to do other tasks, and they can still be utilised if nobody is injured. Anyway, her nick is derived in part from her coppery hair and in part from her bad habit of being almost laconic in her sending, almost to the point where you're being softly jabbed. Has a tendency to be no-nonsense and utterly direct to the point of tact being a foreign concept. Has latched on to Blackrunes sense of tact to compensate and will defer to her judgement when she inevitably causes offense.

[dragoongfa]

WTF? Razor One is back? Hold the presses, this needs to be commemorated.

[Razor One]

Post 1337 on your post count is commemoration enough, no?

[novius]

I had hestitated to write the actual battle against these two, but I think I'll pick it up on the setup for the upcoming attack/siege....

[dragoongfa]

Sorry for the short part but it was a long hard day at work and I am totally out of steam. Will write the engagement tomorrow.

[novius]

Sorry for the short part but it was a long had day at work and I am totally out of steam. Will write the engagement tomorrow.

The battle might be easy compared to bringing Duskcrown up to date with the recent events... Would they go for full disclosure, or would they carefully doctor the data package sent to the Green River, for example to edit out Alex's origins and medical data? Though, trying to redact the data could be tantamount to treason or mutiny.

And, even if Stillstorm goes for full disclosure, we already have an example on how the Mizol on the receiving ships would react to the data being sent and its consequences...

[Zarya]

Spoilers ho.

SpoilerShow

I'd initially started writing to introduce a couple of new characters tending the forges just before the arianesin decided to show up, but had to scrap that plan when Zarya updated, so I changed them from tending the forges to being with the ore gathering party and adjusting as necessary.

Decided to ratchet up the stakes a bit. The way I picture them, arianesin are solitary hunters when times are plenty, and pack hunters in leaner times, with the pack allowing them to take down more dangerous prey such as wayward loroi dirals.

I figure there might be a bit of conflict on the leadership front between leaving their position for a better one or sticking it out where they are since they already have the best position. There's also a fire under their collective asses to fortify their position and produce weapons pronto for the more general group as well, to say nothing of what technically counts as an upcoming battle. If they can wipe out an arianesin pack, that's probably major bragging rights, and with all that skin and fur, they're all getting arianesin skin cloaks for extra badassery.

Not to say that running away isn't also a plausible solution. Just less exciting from a narrative standpoint.

On the character front, widening the scope a little to give a view from other characters was originally my aim, but I couldn't quite work it in organically with the angle of approach I had to take. Check the second spoiler below for details to my additions to the cast.

SpoilerShow

This is for those who might decide to use (or are just interested in) Blackrune (sillar lazal) and Copperspike (bein toniin) just in case I disappear again and don't get to characterise them as I'd originally planned.

Blackrune is one of the groups tinkerers. Good with her head and her hands, her nickname is earned because if her raven black hair, grey eyes, and her habit of marking anything she makes with patterns or lettering, always complaining that it never feels quite finished until she does that. Has a decent amount of general knowledge and is keenly interested in trying to reproduce Natan's firearm as a kind of hobby project if the materials can be spared. She's already been casting a weather eye at reproducing ammunition for his musket in the meantime. Tends to favour technical skills over fighting skills. Is friends with Copperspike with the attendant thick skin that requires.

Copperspike is one of the groups medics. While they are training to be Soroin, putting people on specialised duties makes sense since it frees up others to do other tasks, and they can still be utilised if nobody is injured. Anyway, her nick is derived in part from her coppery hair and in part from her bad habit of being almost laconic in her sending, almost to the point where you're being softly jabbed. Has a tendency to be no-nonsense and utterly direct to the point of tact being a foreign concept. Has latched on to Blackrunes sense of tact to compensate and will defer to her judgement when she inevitably causes offense.

This is good stuff. Orion also mentioned some characters / names in the first instalments. It’d be good for this story to give more exposure to a wider group of characters.

SpoilerShow

The beginning of New Frontiers mentions that the leadership of the Diral may contact the Elders in three circumstances only: “Do not use the communicator unless the entire diral is threatened, an initiate dies, or we contact you.”

I can only imagine the Elders contacting the Diral after noticing half the forest is on fire, rather than the Diral having to contact them. The Diral is under threat aspect is more tricky and could be a cause of drama because it is linked with an after the fact assessment of Argent’s leadership.

[dragoongfa]

@novius

Duskcrown is the Tinza sector commander so she is bound to have very high security clearance while also having a high ranking Mizol in her staff (probably a Torimor) who will divulge any and all information that she deems necessary for the sector commander to make an informed decision on the matter at hand.

Problem is that the 'proper' discussion about the human and his Lotai will have to be done after the fleet is safe.

SpoilerShow

I intend to have Stillstorm send Duskcrown Alex's genetic data while telling her that her Mizol staffer will inform her of the classified issues at hand with the promise of sending a detailed report once at Nezel.

@Zarya

The plausible reason for the Diral not calling in would be their warrior ethos. The pack of large carnivores is a threat but they are still animals and the Diral is able to procure the weapons necessary to combat them. The pack may be starving but they too may elect to back away if they come face to face with a wall of sharpened wooden pikes, long spears and a rain of arrows, survival instinct and all that.

Also, maybe Nathan could make some more gunpowder and bullets for his musket, black gunpowder is a mix of charcoal, sulfur and saltpeper, the tricky part to find would be sulfur as it is usually found in volcanoes.

[entity2636]

The beginning of New Frontiers mentions that the leadership of the Diral may contact the Elders in three circumstances only: “Do not use the communicator unless the entire diral is threatened, an initiate dies, or we contact you.”

Come to think of it, it is a very good example of Argent's lack of judgement and inability to think beyond the rules. Of course, the rules state, black on white, so to say, that they may contact their elders only if a, b or c happens and under no other circumstances, period. It is understandable, that the elders did not anticipate any extraordinary circumstances that the diral might run into and thus didn't make provisions in the rules, after all, all this happens in their own back yard, so to say, but still I do believe that a sensible person would disregard any and all rules were they to encounter an alien of an unknown species in said back yard. I would say that Argent's decision to NOT break the rules and to not contact their elders should by all means be seen as a failure of leadership and decision making on her part by her superiors. We're talking first contact and a matter of national security (how the hell did an alien end up on the Union's Capital world without anyone noticing, etc.

On the third hand, we're talking soroin here, your bread-and-butter greenshirts, the first and last word out of who's mouths should be "Ma'am", and if ordered to jump, they'd ask how high, not why, and a good example of inherent Loroi inflexibility, lack of creativity and 2D thinking.

[Zarya]

Aha, I happen to think Argent is fantastic and made the right calls at the right time.

[Werra]

With the transmission speeds involved it's a given in my opinion that Duskcrown has received any and all data on Alex even before her ship jumps.
She may not have time to read it, but the data should be there, in full. A verbal report would then surely be called for at Nezel.
Issues of security can be handled by transmitting it all with a tight laser beam.

Why and how would SG51 even stop this info reaching Duskcrown?

As to why the Diral doesn't call the Elders...they're young and inexperienced. They likely don't know exactly what is meant by "Diral in danger" and sure as hell don't want to risk failing.

@Argent
Well...not calling in having found a new alien species that also has perfect Lotai and looks like the template species can't be good. Imagine Nathan dies and Loroi society at large can only inspect his corpse.

[entity2636]

Aha, I happen to think Argent is fantastic and made the right calls at the right time.

Well, it's the same situation as with all horror and thriller movies or novels - if everyone made the right and sensible choices, there wouldn't be a story left I forgot to say that in my previous post

[novius]

On the third hand, we're talking soroin here, your bread-and-butter greenshirts, the first and last word out of who's mouths should be "Ma'am", and if ordered to jump, they'd ask how high, not why, and a good example of inherent Loroi inflexibility, lack of creativity and 2D thinking.

Greenshirts don't ask 'how high?'. They just do it and try to get as high as they could. But, yes. Can you expect a wet-behind-her-pointed-ears initiate to make the right call in a situation where seasoned and bloodied officers do fail in a similar one? In some instances, Argent did show more level-headedness than officers twice as old as her, four hundred tozons later...

[novius]

Duskcrown is the Tinza sector commander so she is bound to have very high security clearance while also having a high ranking Mizol in her staff (probably a Torimor) who will divulge any and all information that she deems necessary for the sector commander to make an informed decision on the matter at hand.

Problem with spooks is, that what they deem necessary for you to know might not coincide with your own judgement. Already one Mizol made the wrong call about this and paid dearly for it.

But yes, Duskcrown's Mizol is most probably too clear of mind to fall into the same trap and would go for full disclosure about the files and the orders they contain.

[dragoongfa]

Hmm... After thinking about it we may have to introduce an extra Mizol in the story because of Alex's ability to 'detect' the Shell Lotai.

SpoilerShow

The ability to detect the Shell Lotai is of extreme strategic importance and as such Duskcrown's chief Mizol staffer will do all she can to counter it, the moment she hears about Alex's ability to detect the Lotai she will have to get her hands on him to figure out how he detects it and if it is a skill that a Loroi can emulate (I suggest for a Loroi to be able to copy the skill, in order to not make Alex a Mary Sue).

Such a Mizol would have to be high ranking, extremely capable and somewhat of a counter balance character wise to Duskcrown. Tempo and Brightshield can't really fulfill this role; Tempo because she is compromised and perhaps isn't skilled enough while Brightshield is certainly not skilled enough.

If people don't mind we can use Mizol Torimor Shadowcloud from 'Looking forward to the Mirror', she fills the requirements and is a difficult character to work with professionally wise so she should serve as the basis for some drama. Her role would be strictly to see how to use Alex's telepathic talents against the Umiak so she doesn't have to hog the spotlight for long. Plus she will immediately realize the subconscious mechanism of Alex's 'bonding' (should they connect after Alex's training) and how it affects the Loroi he 'bonds' with.

I will leave it up to you guys if we should use her and if her Teidar bodyguards are to tag along for the ride.

Character Outline: Shadowcloud (Adapted for Beacons)

Caste: Mizol
Rank: Torimor
Age: 262 years.
Height: 1.76 meters or 5.77 feet
Weight: 65 Kilograms or 143 libr
Hair color: Black
Skin color: Light cyan
Eye color: Hazel
Planet of Birth: Taben
Planet that she was raised up: Perrein
Mother's Caste: Listel.
Father's Caste: A male caste with eidetic memory.
Telepathic Potency: High to Very high
Telekinetic Potency: Very High to Extreme; described as monstrous when using an amplifier
Telepathic and Telekinetic proficiency: Best described as Master, some Loroi would call her a Sage.
Number of Children: 12. 11 females, one male. Three of the females and the male pre-war, the rest during the war. All of her daughters successfully became warriors for the Mizol, Teidar or Listel depending on their telepathic, telekinetic or eidetic skills. 5 of them died during the war.

Shadowcloud is best described as a high ranking Intelligence Agent with a penchant for on hands investigations and black ops wetwork.

Her telepathic and telekinetic potential was discovered early in her childhood and her Telekinetic potency caused quite a bit of friction between the Mizol and the Teidar at the time. If she was only a Telekinetic the Teidar would have gotten her but the Mizol pushed for her due to her Eidetic memory. Listel mothers always preferred to have the memory skills of their daughters used for combat related purposes and her mother prefered to have her enter the Mizol caste where she knew that Shadowcloud would use her eidetic memory in ways that she as Listel never would be able. The Teidar generally using their members with Eidetic memories as caste archives and historians instead of intelligence officers like the Mizol do.

At Perrein Shadowcloud became the leader of her diral band, which for the Loroi is more of a curse than a recognition of capability. This was due to her background and the fact that she wasn't a native of Perrein. Regardless of this fact she proved to be an effective diral leader, although she could be described as bullyish in the way she led her band.

After becoming a full fledged warrior she was quickly thrown into the deep end of the Intelligence world. With her eidetic memories she was an excellent spy/analyst while her telekinetic abilities made her a potent martial asset. She quickly made a name for herself for discovering, analyzing and eliminating threats to the safety and stability of the Loroi Empire. It was during this early stage of her life that she became what is best described as a Mizol supremacist.

She quickly drew the attention of high ranking Mizol and former Mizol Torrais, including future Emperor Greywind. She was an early proponent for a deep Mizol investigation into the Umiak hierarchy and was even part of the Mizol delegation that petitioned the Third Loroi Emperor Eighth Dawn for financing and supporting such an operation. The downright insulting way that this proposition was shot down became a bitter memory for her and the other members of that delegation and sparked the beggining of an underground Mizol movement to subvert Eighth Dawn's reign.

Shadowcloud became a key figure of that movement but the beginning of the war marked the postponing and later disbanding of that movement. Eighth Dawn's death and Greywind's ascension became a key political victory for the Mizol but fragmentary evidence of that movement's existence were used as an excuse for the failed coup against Greywind (who may or may not have been part of that movement herself).

After the coup's violent subjugation ShadowCloud joked morbidly that she killed more Loroi then and there than Umiak agents throughout the entirety of the war up to that point. Many expected that she would ascend to the Torrai caste but she herself vehemently opposed this, thinking (rightfully so) that her known Mizol supremacist views and her part in the coup's subjugation could be used against Emperor Greywind. Despite this she continued her exemplar intelligence work, uncovering numerous subversive plots instigated by Umiak agents/sympathizers.

She was a very loud opponent of the Tithric campaign, fearing that the downright genocide of the Tithric would prove problematic later on; she did wish for an exemplary punishment for what she saw as war profiteering by the Tithric but she was a proponent of an occupation and using the Tithric as living shields rather than killing the majority of their population and practically annihilating them as a political entity. During the Semoset campaign even she was shocked to discover how damaging to the Loroi war effort the Tithric issue had become.

After the collapse of the Semoset offensive she was among the many Mizol tasked with maintaining order in the Union and attempting to spy on the Hierarchy. Just before the story begins she was at Tinja sector overseeing the preparation of a deep intelligence operation to the former Umiak-Tithric frontier. An operation that was put on hold due to the disappearance of a Loroi picket squadron deep into former Tithric space.

Fun Facts:

Mizol Supremacist: She sees other castes as sentimental/temperamental fools, with the Listel and Teidar being somewhat better than the others. (she keeps this to herself, most of the time)
She has barely managed to kill more Umiak than Loroi subversive elements.
Prefers a more hands on approach for missions.
Could be described as a mild bully, her motto being: Whatever makes one stronger is acceptable.
She tends to understand the abstract way of thinking of aliens.
Hates Umiak.
Likes Perrein cooking.
Has sparingly visited Taben for recreation.
Really hates Umiak.
She once posed as a Doranzer medic to impress a male.
Did I mention that she really hates Umiak?

[Werra]

If a child has both high telekinetic and telepathic aptitute, she is trained as a Teidar. And having all her children express either Mizol/Teidar or Listel abilities is a bit much, since it's only a bit dependent on genes.

Does Duskcrown even need a counter balance in the story?