Writing Prompts

A spot for collections of Outsider-related original fan fiction and related works.

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Arioch
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Arioch »

Not trying to derail the Writing Prompts thread, but I'm not sure where else to put this. I don't think we're quite ready for a dedicated thread on the subject.
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Krulle wrote:Does the current storyline end with the birth of Echo?
No. I think I've mentioned before that the narrator in Outsider is Alex's future self, looking back on the events of the story. After the climactic chapter, there is a short epilogue that wraps up the story, in which we meet future Alex and the people he has been telling the story to (who are, as it turns out, the principal characters in Project Forward).

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dragoongfa
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by dragoongfa »

Don't worry Arioch, planning that far ahead is a good sign in my book; writing it as you go tends to create a lot of trouble on the way, look at GRRM and his mess :P

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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Krulle »

Arioch wrote:Not trying to derail the Writing Prompts thread, but I'm not sure where else to put this. I don't think we're quite ready for a dedicated thread on the subject.
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Krulle wrote:Does the current storyline end with the birth of Echo?
No. I think I've mentioned before that the narrator in Outsider is Alex's future self, looking back on the events of the story. After the climactic chapter, there is a short epilogue that wraps up the story, in which we meet future Alex and the people he has been telling the story to (who are, as it turns out, the principal characters in Project Forward).
Ahh, thanks.

Haven't expected an answer, but it is much appreciated!
Vote for Outsider on TWC: Image
charred steppes, borders of territories: page 59,
jump-map of local stars: page 121, larger map in Loroi: page 118,
System view Leido Crossroads: page 123, after the battle page 195

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dragoongfa
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by dragoongfa »

Made some corrections and I cleaned out some stuff from the latest installment.

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sunphoenix
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by sunphoenix »

YES! A new Years present! Beacons BRAIN CANDY! :)

And.. GASP!!! Project: Forward?!?!? A sequel to Outsider?!? I'm literally bouncing in my chair in excitement!!!
Last edited by sunphoenix on Fri Jan 03, 2020 6:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.
PbP:
[IC] Deep Strike 'Lt' Kamielle Lynn
[IC] Cydonia Rising/Tempest Sonnidezi Stormrage
[IC] Incursion Maiannon Golden Hair
[IC] TdSmR Athen Rourke

"...you can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is Kill him."

entity2636
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by entity2636 »

I enjoyed the latest installment very much, Dragoon, thank you, and am looking forward to the next one.

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Ithekro
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Ithekro »

That's a lot of preplanning into a universe. I love that.

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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Dorfington »

dragoongfa wrote:And there, finally sat my ass down and soldiered through the final part.
Your work is always a joy to read. I hope things turn out for the best for you irl.

Any idea when you might pick up your Reforged story again? :D

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dragoongfa
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by dragoongfa »

I will start having some extra personal time soon and I will look into going back into a proper writing schedule; Reforged will have time invested in it soon.

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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by sunphoenix »

I seems all the "What to do about Jardin" threads have been removed... too bad...
PbP:
[IC] Deep Strike 'Lt' Kamielle Lynn
[IC] Cydonia Rising/Tempest Sonnidezi Stormrage
[IC] Incursion Maiannon Golden Hair
[IC] TdSmR Athen Rourke

"...you can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is Kill him."

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Razor One
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Razor One »

I found it over in Outsider Discussion. Link.

I could move it over here to make it easier to find though.
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This is my Mod voice. If you see this in a thread, it means that the time for gentle reminders has passed.

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sunphoenix
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by sunphoenix »

I'd appreciate it if you would Razor One, and there are no objections?
PbP:
[IC] Deep Strike 'Lt' Kamielle Lynn
[IC] Cydonia Rising/Tempest Sonnidezi Stormrage
[IC] Incursion Maiannon Golden Hair
[IC] TdSmR Athen Rourke

"...you can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is Kill him."

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Arioch
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Arioch »

I already moved it.

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orion1836
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Backwater

Post by orion1836 »

Are you sure you want to do this? Ember eyed the brown liquid warily. It slid smoothly around the glass as she swirled it.

Windfall grinned wolfishly at the orange-haired Loroi.

Thirty-two jumps, three of which were scoped. I'd say that deserves a drink, alien or not. Besides, she waved the scanner at her compatriot, it says that nothing in here will kill us.

Ember rolled her eyes. There's a lot of horribleness short of dying. Tell you what... you go first.

You've got to learn to take more risks if you want to be in this line of work, the free trader scoffed. Tucking a strand of dark emerald hair behind an ear, she downed her glass.

The whisk-ee was far smoother than she expected, though the taste was nothing like the spirits her crew had brought to trade. Windfall had nothing to compare it to, so she simply passed the taste as best she could through sanzai to her partner.

Ember's relief was palpable - she really had thought it would cause some sort of adverse reaction. Well, it hadn't... yet.

The ex-Listel tentatively sipped her drink, only to pull a face as she tasted it for herself.

You expect to sell this back home?

Windfall shrugged. Someone will pay well for it. If not us, maybe one of the other races. The rarity alone will fetch a good price.

And to think we traded good leinmemal for this.

Well I like it, Windfall retorted, taking Ember's glass and downing it. Her partner's eyes widened in surprise, but she didn't object. Besides, we got a good deal.

Now it was Ember's turn to roll her eyes. We don't know how valuable their spirits are. That bartender could have given us his cheapest fare and we wouldn't know the difference.

It was true, but between her gut and the circumstances, Windfall didn't think she had been cheated. The Stray Sheep was hardly a location for inter-species trade, which was her entire reason for coming here. The bar wasn't even the largest in the Esperanza colony. Once the bartender got over the shock of bonafide aliens walking into his establishment, and the further surprise that they both spoke his language, he proved to be very pliable when it came to negotiations. Three bottles of Loroi spirits (the first in the system, if not all Human space) in exchange for a sampling of nine bottles of Human alcohol, along with complementary drinks for the traders, was more than fair.

A crowd had gathered at the bar to marvel at the alien bottles, but other than obvious glances in their direction, none of the locals had mustered the courage to approach the table the Loroi had taken in the corner.

So what happens next? Ember asked.

Stick to the plan, the captain replied, get in, barter for a good sampling of trade goods, and get out before Union bureaucrats start setting up red tape around everything.

How long do you think we have?

Windfall sighed. Not as long as I had hoped. You saw that governor. You would think that a border world would be more... relaxed... but I bet he was sending messages to his superiors the second we showed up on their scanners.

Ember's nervousness was palpable. I bet the only reason he's giving us the liberty we have is because he thinks we're some sort of official envoy, and he just didn't get the right notification. Should we plan to depart early?

The trader nodded. Yes, that's probably a good idea. I had hoped for three local days, but now I think we'd best leave in two. I have no idea how long it takes them to get a message to their central government. Any updates from the crew?

Everyone else had split up to go after pre-assigned trade targets. The other Loroi glanced at her comm. On or ahead of schedule. You know, we could depart as early as tomorrow morning if we gave up...

Not a chance, Windfall interrupted, venting frustration at Ember. How do you think I got most of the crew to agree to this insanity?

Ember sighed. I am just saying that if anything will land us in trouble, it will be a dozen or so Humans brought back to the Union. I've said it from the beginning. A little trade and profiteering may be overlooked, especially considering that we mapped and validated new jump routes, but people?

Maia is not like the rest of the Union, especially among civilians. Look, you were military... I don't expect you to understand.

The other Loroi winced, and her anguish at the thought was palpable. Windfall immediately sent placating thoughts by way of apology.

My point is, she continued, you've had what, two... three children?

Two, Ember confirmed.

Someone like me, or anyone else on The Donei Runner may never get a chance to mate. Meanwhile, these Humans just pair off like it's nothing. Imagine... your own male for life.

Ember wrinkled her nose. They'd had this argument before. She viewed Humanity in the same way the Barsam viewed the Nibiren.

If you're into that sort of thing, she scoffed.

Oh come on, Windfall grinned roguishly at the younger Loroi, you can't honestly look around and tell me there's nothing here you like.

She felt the ex-Listel start to object, but relent mid-way through. Ember knew she couldn't hide the truth of the matter.

They are just so... large. And their appearance varies so... so... She couldn't put any specifics on the mental images that followed.

I don't disagree with you there, Windfall replied. They age so rapidly, and it shows in a variety of ways, but still, there are so many of them. It is just a matter of choosing well.

You assume we can even engage in this 'marriage' practice in the short amount of time we have. May I remind you that while I know it exists, I know almost nothing about the practicalities of it.

Ember was right, but even so the captain was hopeful. Stumbling across this disgraced ex-Listel was perhaps the biggest stroke of luck in all of Windfall's thirty years of trading. Had it not been for those last few close jumps, she would have thought that Ember had consumed the rest of her luck. Though she was still far too rule-oriented to fit in on The Donei Runner, the knowledge she brought with her on Humanity was invaluable. Without her, Windfall would have never contemplated such a risky venture. Sure, Ember's memory of the jump routes had been limited to what had been shared among her caste before the First Expedition had arrived at Humanity's homeworld and the war ended, but it was enough to get them safely in the neighborhood. The Runner's crew was practiced enough in making scoped jumps to get them the rest of the way. Additionally, the orange-haired Loroi had been able to learn the Human common-lingua before she left the fleet, and had spent the majority of the voyage teaching it to the rest of the crew.

The language was difficult to learn, but Windfall had made it a rule that anyone who couldn't speak it would not be allowed off the ship come planetfall. Given that the entire crew was set on acquiring a 'partner,' it had served as a powerful motivator.

Look, she continued, we all knew this was going to be a do-or-die venture. If the Union wants our asses for it, they're going to get them regardless of what we do. I'm betting, though, that in the oncoming rush to assimilate the Union's newest member, no one is going to notice a single trader that happened to beat the rest by a week or two, or a dozen humans that may have showed up a little early. If we happen to corner a few markets, we'll be set for the rest of our lives.

Ember sighed, mentally conceding the point. Well, if we are going to convince some of these people to come back with us, we'd better start now. We don't have much time.

That's the spirit! Windfall glanced around, then mentally nudged the other Loroi. And hey, you may be in luck... look over by the entrance, it seems they make their males Loroi-sized after all.

Surprise registered on the other Loroi's pale blue eyes as she saw what Windfall had seen. Sure enough, there was a male Human who had just entered the bar. He was maybe two-thirds the size of the rest, and built very similarly to a male Loroi.

A wave of disappointment almost immediately followed from Ember. Unfortunately, we may be too late. Observe, it appears he is already partnered.

Windfall turned to look. Sure enough, the male approached one of the wait staff, a brown-haired woman with gray highlights. They appeared to know each other well, and she seemed displeased with the interruption.

Ah, but look, the captain sent back along with a wave of hope. There are no rings on his fingers, she noted, highlighting the one custom that had come with Ember's knowledge on the subject. It is a convenient practice, is it not?

The ex-Listel was not convinced. Still, I don't know if it is wise to...

But Windfall was already rising from her seat. Well, if you are unwilling, then I will make an attempt. Fortune favors the bold, after all.

The captain knew she was pushing her luck, but after three unproven jumps that nearly killed her crew, she was not going to fear a matter of mere selan. Ember's protests faded into the background as she approached the male and the server.
Last edited by orion1836 on Tue Jan 21, 2020 1:30 am, edited 2 times in total.

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dragoongfa
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by dragoongfa »

LOL @orion1836

I have a feeling that you were going for a teenage boy running errands for his mother/aunt but I would be half tempted to write him out as a 'friendzoned' short stack finally getting lucky.

EDIT: Let me put it like this: I am about 183cm tall (6 feet), not attractive per se but I dress well and show affluence. I have friends who are around 150+ and their dating prospects are so bad that they used me as 'bait' for them to get even some passing attention.

Seriously, being a short man makes it ridiculously harder to get some romantic attention from women.

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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by orion1836 »

dragoongfa wrote:LOL @orion1836

I have a feeling that you were going for a teenage boy running errands for his mother/aunt but I would be half tempted to write him out as a 'friendzoned' short stack finally getting lucky.

EDIT: Let me put it like this: I am about 183cm tall (6 feet), not attractive per se but I dress well and show affluence. I have friends who are around 150+ and their dating prospects are so bad that they used me as 'bait' for them to get even some passing attention.

Seriously, being a short man makes it ridiculously harder to get some romantic attention from women.
I was trying to convey a teenager going to his mother for something with poor Windfall running into a metric shit-ton of cultural selan.

But yes, back when I was still seriously doing online dating, I found it hilarious to see how many women put "6' and up only" in their profiles. I'm sure they don't realize that's < 15% of the male population, even today.

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Werra
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Werra »

I like it, it's like watching a train speed along on tracks that go straight off a clif.

I'd also like to take this opportunity to remind you all that Arioch thought up the setting when he was a teenager.

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dragoongfa
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by dragoongfa »

I wonder, what would be a bigger trainwreck?

Them hitting on a shy teenager in front of his mother?

Or them hitting on an quiet, unassuming but really angry short man who will, once drunk, start running his mouth about people's wives and daughters; letting out all the dirty laundry he knows because 'he was such a good friend' to some of them that they shared all the dirty secrets.

Then the barfight would start...

And since Loroi are equally as strong as men of equal height...

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Werra
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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by Werra »

My money is on the ephebophilia. Everybody knows that people are two-faced liars anyway. So a drunk dude ranting would be the talk of the town, but most people should laugh it off. The angry man will also have quite the mood boost if he is suddenly the most attractive to these Loroi. Think of the jealousy.

Making moves on somebodies kid is a far bigger taboo. It activates some really deep rooted defense mechanisms. Doing it in the face of the mom is very brave. But since it's being done by "women", the men might keep out of it.

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Re: Writing Prompts

Post by EdwardSteed »

Werra wrote:My money is on the ephebophilia.

Making moves on somebodies kid is a far bigger taboo. It activates some really deep rooted defense mechanisms. Doing it in the face of the mom is very brave. But since it's being done by "women", the men might keep out of it.
orion1836 wrote:a metric shit-ton of cultural selan.
How long will it take them to eventually figure out what the fuss is actually about? Even when they know the guy's birth date and try to correct for the differences in human life span the Loroi are still going to have the wrong idea about age.

He's already 16? How has he survived without a mate for so long?

And what happens when all the other teenagers eager to lose their virginity hear about the smoking hot promiscuous alien cougars roaming the colony? Will there be a riot at the local high school? Can Loroi smell receptors tolerate that much axe body spray?

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